Alternatives to Open Discussion
when working with groups in Conflict

Pressure Mapping

The Process:
1. Tell a group to, “Imagine a counterpart in a conflict. Call them to mind with some specificity. Then draw a small circle in the center of a blank paper and draw arrows or vectors in from the outside. With each arrow write a few words that might relate directly to the pressures or stresses that they might be feeling. These pressures could relate directly to the conflict or to some other aspect of their lives.”
2. Have people share their “maps” with each other.
3. Invite the group hearing their own pressures sympathetically framed to respond. The group of people hearing how the others imagine their own stresses might add missing ones or clarify stresses that are listed.

Strengths:
1. People are usually eager to demonstrate how smart they are about the others world – we assume that they don’t have a clue.
2. Empathy building and helping people feel heard.

Structured Go-Around

The Process
1. Give a short explanation of what the group will do.
2. Give a time frame for each person if this is important.
3. Decide if you want to allow for people to pass and communicate this.
4. Choose someone to start who will set a positive tone.

Categories of Questions
1. Questions that explore the impact of the conflict on the parties.
2. Questions that explore the party’s fears.
3. Questions that invite party’s to state what they appreciate in others.
4. Questions that explore the intentions and hopes of the parties in getting together (to work toward resolution?) “If you could wave a magic wand and it would be the end of this meeting and it would have gone well, what happened that allowed the meeting to be a positive experience?”
5. Invitations to speak about exceptions to the conflict when they were able to work together well.
6. Questions that explore how the parties’ actions affected the conflict. “So that is how the conflict affected you, now tell me how you affected the conflict?”
7. Questions that invite people to own their contributions to a conflict or regrets. “Are there ways in which this conflict has gotten you to act out of character in ways that you would have liked to have done differently?”

Strengths
1. Makes room for quiet members
2. Limits arguing
3. Creates space for thoughtful responses and opportunity to listen
4. It is a very controlled way of getting into sensitive topics

Continuum of Perspective

The Process
1. Take an issue that parties are at impasse around. For example if a church should be an “open and affirming church” of gays and lesbians.
2. Draw a line on a piece of paper and identify six or eight different positions that people might take on the issue. For example:
a. We should recruit a gay or lesbian minister and actively work for justice for gay people
b. We should not recruit a gay minister, but should be open to hiring one if they are the best candidate. We should actively work together for justice for gay people and welcome gays and lesbians into our church and commit to not preaching in such a way that would alienate them.
c. We should not recruit a gay minister, but should be open to hiring one if they are the best candidate. We should not actively work together for justice for gay people since we are not in agreement on this issue but should welcome them into our congregation.
d. We should not recruit a gay minister, nor should we hire a gay minister, but we should welcome gay and lesbians into our community and do whatever it takes not to alienate them.
3. Ask people to locate themselves on the continuum

Strengths
1. Allows people to move beyond two camps into a less positional conversation.
2. Encourages diverse thinking and recognition of diverse perspectives in a conversation
3. It encourages people to move into some of the uncertainty in their thinking, which can create more positive interactions.

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