Working with Strong Emotions

When group members are feeling strong emotions, trying to get them to “stick to the facts,” will only make things worse. When people’s emotions get triggered they are often not very rational. In order to let go of strong feelings most people need the feelings understood, accepted and acknowledged – not evaluated. Only after this is done can successful problem solving begin.

When working with group members who exhibit strong emotions try the following:

1. Be aware of ways you are triggered by their emotions and watch yourself so you don’t unconsciously react in ways that won’t be effective.
2. Treat the emotions as information.
3. Acknowledge the emotions by paraphrasing content and feelings.
4. Ask others how they feel about the situation.
5. Keep the conversations focused on emotions, even if some members become uncomfortable and start to problem solve.
6. Ask clarifying questions to try to understand what is at the heart of the matter
7. Stay neutral
8. Don’t feel responsible for the emotions of the group.